GEORGE LUCAS, EAT YOUR HEART OUT

A few decades after its conception, the Star Wars lightsaber is here, and like everything worth buying, it's on sale on the internet.

But this is apparently not a very good thing, seeing as the lightsaber is both cheap and 1000 times more potent than those commercial laser pointers that drive your pets insane, and can, among other things, blind instantly, set fire to skin, cause cancer and create general mayhem.

This, from ...

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