It's kind of a given that if you dump
Taylor Swift, she's going to write a song about the relationship because she's essentially still a teenage girl and hasn't yet figured out that just because you wrote it in your diary, doesn't mean you have to make it a song. (I'm looking at you
Alanis Morissette.) And if you're
John Mayer, he of the racist penis and generally douchey manner, it ...