Dear Aaron Carter,
What happened to you? It seems like just yesterday you were an adorable prepubescent boy who threw
obscenely large house parties and made absurd claims that you
beat Shaq at a game of one-on-one in a hopeless attempt to steal some attention from your older brother, Nick (it never would have worked, Aaron. Nick is a Backstreet Boy. Do you even understand the importance of that?). But that was actually several years ...